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“Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he heard that, President Bush agreed and announced plans to bomb Ohio.”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)

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“War continues in Iraq. They're calling it Operation Iraqi Freedom. They were going to call it Operation Iraqi Liberation until they realized that spells 'OIL.'"”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“Bush is smart. I don't think that Bush will ever be impeached, 'cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn't you believe him?”
Jenny0103 Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said, "Would you like some fries with that?"”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“President Bush said it's now time for a change in Iraq and he wants them to have a Western-style democracy like ours. So right now in Iraq, the economy is collapsing, businessmen are corrupt, and Hussein wants his son to take over as president. Sounds like mission accomplished.”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their team to be associated with crime. From now on, they'll just be known as the Bullets.”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“Twenty-one years ago today Saddam Hussein was first elected president of Iraq and he has been re-elected ever since. Apparently they have the same electoral process we do, you don't need the popular vote to win.”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following him. Finally, someone told him, 'Psst. That's the Secret Service.'”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“There was another war-related casualty today. The French were injured when they tried to jump on our bandwagon.”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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“Iraq began destroying those missiles they don't have over the weekend. See, President Bush may be the smartest military president in history. First, he gets Iraq to destroy all of their own weapons. Then he declares war.”
Jay Leno quotes (American TV Host and Comedian, b.1950)
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